The Recipe for a "Mommy" Sick Day

So everyone says that moms never get a day off and there is no such thing as a sick day. Well my friends (and family), these people LIE! Below is the recipe for a sick day.

1) Align babysitting help well in advance for your scheduled sick day. Scheduling a dentist appointment and other mommy type errands during this time will help ensure you babysitter is at your home and ready to help out.

2) Twenty-four hours before your babysitter (or mom in my case) arrives come in contact with some nasty stomach virus germs. (It is very important that your husband and baby DO NOT come in contact with said germs.)

3) On the day your babysitter arrives run all of your errands, and have a fun relaxing day schedule for the 2nd and final day of your babysitter's visit.

4) After your baby is in bed and your babysitter is sleeping peacefully, and right as your husband is getting ready for bed begin getting sick. (You want him to be awake and in the room for your first round... so he realizes just how badly you feel. And make sure to chuckle at his joke when he asks if you will be running your scheduled 4 miles in the AM, as he is turning off your alarm for you.)

5) Continue to get up 3 more times through out the night, making sure you are loud enough to wake him up. (This is not the time to close bathroom doors, he needs to hear it all...)

6) When your husband is up and moving about to leave for work start playing your sympathy card. Ask if he can stay at home for the day. When he says he can't work from home due to work meeting commitments ask him for some Pedialyte when he is able to return home. Then take the monitor to your babysitter, tell her about your night, and ask if she can watch your baby for at least an hour or so.

7) Then go back to bed and sleep until your husband comes home at lunch time with your Pedialyte and holds it over your head until you shower.

8) After your shower and Pedialyte, go back to bed until your baby is crying outside of her daddy's office because she wants to "help" him with his business call.

9) Help your babysitter for a few moments calm your baby down, then head back to bed.

10) Wake up again at dinner time (which you will NOT be eating) to thank your babysitter 100+ times for staying an extended amount of time and for helping get dinner on the table and cleaned up.

11) Then say your good-byes and head back to bed, while your husband puts your baby to bed, you go back to sleep, and your babysitter drives home.

12) Sleep all night and get ready to face the new day... there is no more babysitter. (But at least babies nap, and you can nap during that time.)

While I would not wish the above recipe on any person in the world, this is what our life was like all day yesterday. I am finally functioning enough to want to be on my computer, but not enough to really eat yet. (On a positive note though, I am down 5+ pounds from Wednesday morning.)